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    Maiden Of Metal

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    Maiden Of Metal  Empty Maiden Of Metal

    Post by Guest 8th June 2019, 3:15 am

    Lineage Name: Maiden Of Metal
    Wielder: Menka
    Purchase Proof: Proof

    Description
    Menka has always been a quiet character and up until the age of three had never spoken a word at all. Concerned and worried, her parents had taken her to the local physician in order to try and discover the cause and after an examination, he came to the conclusion that it was a condition of the mind. One that had not only affected her speech but her social abilities in general and if left unchecked, would only become worse as she aged. He offered them the chance for their daughter to undergo a risky procedure in order to fight off the effects and without any cause or reason to doubt him, they accepted the offer without hesitation. Little did they know that it would be the last time that they would ever see her and the simple deception that they had fallen for, blinded by their love for Menka.

    Taken from her family, the girl was then exposed to horrors that only the sickest of minds could fathom. She was experimented on, in order to try and find the route of her problems but none of these twisted tests achieved anything other than to make the girl suffer. The doctor who had appeared so nice originally, was little more than than a freakish and barbaric monster, who seemed to almost enjoy testing out his theories on her. This would go on for years and yet no matter how foul his experiments were, he always managed to keep her alive, just to continue with his wicked work.

    The final experiment, however, would change everything as he managed to obtain a magical crystal of some sort one day and without any warning, forced it down the girls throat. The reaction was both remarkable and frightening at the same time, as one of the girls arms would suddenly turn a metallic grey colour and rip the restraints off of her. Now, a fully grown woman in her own right, she would suddenly sprint towards her tormentor, with a speed that baffled him, clutched him by the throat and lifted him in to the air.

    As he struggled in her grip, there would be not the slightest hint of anything in her distinctive blue eyes but they never left his face. Tightening her grip. he would soon clutching at her arm for air but she paid no attention and instead raised her right hand, which had become a chainsaw like blade.

    Then and only then did she finally actually speak, for the first time in her life, as the lacrima went about its work, fusing with her further.

    "Thank you for giving me the gift of speech, as well as teaching me of the cruelty of man. I will remember it, always."

    With that, she would impale him with her right hand, allowing the blade to do its bloody work, before walking away, free at last.

    Abilities:
    • Maiden's Bounty: Increases the jewels from all jobs by 100% (1 Effect)

    • Durability Of Steel: Increases Menka's resistance against both physical and magical damage by 45% and gains 5% more at B rank to max out at 50% each. (2 Effects)

    • Metal Melee: Increases both Menka's physical strength and speed by 45% and will scale up by 5% each rank, maxing out at 60% each at S rank. (2 Effects)

    • Freedom Of The Maiden: If Menka hits a target with a melee strike or any attack from her Metal Dragon Slayer magic then her strength and speed will both increase by 120% until the end of the fight. (4 Effects)

    • Brute Force: Due to her hellish childhood and use as an experiment, Menka has been infected with numerous body enhancing drugs and medication in order to increase her natural attributes. This grants her two extra signature spells that rank up with her to S, however, they can only be passives. (1 Effect)



    Last edited by Menka on 10th June 2019, 6:55 am; edited 3 times in total
    Nessa Cordelia Lux
    Nessa Cordelia Lux

    Starlight Maiden


    Starlight Maiden

    Administrator- Moderator- Developer/GFX Artist- Main Account- God VIP Status- Dragon VIP Status- Knight VIP Status- Regular VIP Status- VIP- Gain An Artifact- Quality Badge Level 1- Quality Badge Level 2- Quality Badge Level 3- God Of Ishgar- Ten Wizard Saint Member- Rising Star- Custom Slayer- Neutral Guild Ace- Z-Rank- Y-Rank- X-Rank- H-Rank- S-Rank- A-Rank- Wanderer- EXP Grinder- Working Together- Forever Solo- Christian Minecraft Server- I Have Friends...- Teaming Up!- Limited Edition- Hired Help- Idolize- Achiever- Expert Achiever- Over Achiever- Buddy Buddy- Obligatory Beach Episode- Shipped- Sticking Around- Dank Memer- Fan Artist- Taskmaster- Halloween gfx'ers- Halloween Social- Halloween job event participant - Haiku Contest Participant- Richie Rich- Rich- Veteran Level 3- Veteran Level 2- Veteran Level 1- Character History!- Magic Application Approved!- Obtain A Secondary Magic!- Get A Pet!- Character Application Approved!- Complete Your First Job!- Obtain A Lineage!- Join A Faction!- Supreme Grand Master [5000]- Grand Master [2000]- Master [1000]- Senior [500]- Novice [250]- 1st Place Event/Contest Winner- 2nd Place Event/Contest Winner- X-Mas Event Participant- Hero- Summer Special Donor- Summer Special Participant- Have Seijin On Your Friends List- Have Onida On Your Friend's List- Have an Admin as a friend!- Have aeluri On Your Friend's List- Best GFX Artist Award- Player 
    Lineage : Vassal of the Cosmos
    Position : None
    Posts : 6990
    Guild : Fairy Tail
    Cosmic Coins : 145
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 26,209

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Starlight Maiden
    Second Skill: Valkyrie Summoner
    Third Skill: Moon Goddess Slayer

    Maiden Of Metal  Empty Re: Maiden Of Metal

    Post by Nessa Cordelia Lux 10th June 2019, 5:32 am

    Hey there, So I'll be grading this for you. The effects themselves are fine, however, you have them all set at S Rank passive, and your character is only C. So ideally, I need you to scale them by rank from C-S. Once you've done this, bump and I'll take a look.

    Spoiler:


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    Maiden Of Metal  60582_s

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    Maiden Of Metal  Empty Re: Maiden Of Metal

    Post by Guest 10th June 2019, 6:01 am

    That should do it, I believe.

    One thing I'd like to ask about whether I can increase the numbers in "The Freedom Of The Maiden" a little. I'm not actually sure what the numbers are supposed to be for that and I took a bit of a guess.

    Nessa Cordelia Lux
    Nessa Cordelia Lux

    Starlight Maiden


    Starlight Maiden

    Administrator- Moderator- Developer/GFX Artist- Main Account- God VIP Status- Dragon VIP Status- Knight VIP Status- Regular VIP Status- VIP- Gain An Artifact- Quality Badge Level 1- Quality Badge Level 2- Quality Badge Level 3- God Of Ishgar- Ten Wizard Saint Member- Rising Star- Custom Slayer- Neutral Guild Ace- Z-Rank- Y-Rank- X-Rank- H-Rank- S-Rank- A-Rank- Wanderer- EXP Grinder- Working Together- Forever Solo- Christian Minecraft Server- I Have Friends...- Teaming Up!- Limited Edition- Hired Help- Idolize- Achiever- Expert Achiever- Over Achiever- Buddy Buddy- Obligatory Beach Episode- Shipped- Sticking Around- Dank Memer- Fan Artist- Taskmaster- Halloween gfx'ers- Halloween Social- Halloween job event participant - Haiku Contest Participant- Richie Rich- Rich- Veteran Level 3- Veteran Level 2- Veteran Level 1- Character History!- Magic Application Approved!- Obtain A Secondary Magic!- Get A Pet!- Character Application Approved!- Complete Your First Job!- Obtain A Lineage!- Join A Faction!- Supreme Grand Master [5000]- Grand Master [2000]- Master [1000]- Senior [500]- Novice [250]- 1st Place Event/Contest Winner- 2nd Place Event/Contest Winner- X-Mas Event Participant- Hero- Summer Special Donor- Summer Special Participant- Have Seijin On Your Friends List- Have Onida On Your Friend's List- Have an Admin as a friend!- Have aeluri On Your Friend's List- Best GFX Artist Award- Player 
    Lineage : Vassal of the Cosmos
    Position : None
    Posts : 6990
    Guild : Fairy Tail
    Cosmic Coins : 145
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 26,209

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Starlight Maiden
    Second Skill: Valkyrie Summoner
    Third Skill: Moon Goddess Slayer

    Maiden Of Metal  Empty Re: Maiden Of Metal

    Post by Nessa Cordelia Lux 10th June 2019, 6:49 am

    Okay so to answer your question, there is no cap on buff via a lineage as long as it remains within the permitted effects. So for every ability buffed by 60% counts as one effect. Also as I was checking 'Freedom Of The Maiden', I realised your buffing BOTH Strength and Speed for up to 120% which is 4 effects, not 2. However, 'Brute Force' actually only classes as 1 effect. As a result, you have 11 effects in this lineage, which is one too many. Please remove one effect. Bump as usual and I'll take a look.

    Spoiler:


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    Maiden Of Metal  60582_s

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    Maiden Of Metal  Empty Re: Maiden Of Metal

    Post by Guest 10th June 2019, 6:56 am

    Ok, let's try this.
    Nessa Cordelia Lux
    Nessa Cordelia Lux

    Starlight Maiden


    Starlight Maiden

    Administrator- Moderator- Developer/GFX Artist- Main Account- God VIP Status- Dragon VIP Status- Knight VIP Status- Regular VIP Status- VIP- Gain An Artifact- Quality Badge Level 1- Quality Badge Level 2- Quality Badge Level 3- God Of Ishgar- Ten Wizard Saint Member- Rising Star- Custom Slayer- Neutral Guild Ace- Z-Rank- Y-Rank- X-Rank- H-Rank- S-Rank- A-Rank- Wanderer- EXP Grinder- Working Together- Forever Solo- Christian Minecraft Server- I Have Friends...- Teaming Up!- Limited Edition- Hired Help- Idolize- Achiever- Expert Achiever- Over Achiever- Buddy Buddy- Obligatory Beach Episode- Shipped- Sticking Around- Dank Memer- Fan Artist- Taskmaster- Halloween gfx'ers- Halloween Social- Halloween job event participant - Haiku Contest Participant- Richie Rich- Rich- Veteran Level 3- Veteran Level 2- Veteran Level 1- Character History!- Magic Application Approved!- Obtain A Secondary Magic!- Get A Pet!- Character Application Approved!- Complete Your First Job!- Obtain A Lineage!- Join A Faction!- Supreme Grand Master [5000]- Grand Master [2000]- Master [1000]- Senior [500]- Novice [250]- 1st Place Event/Contest Winner- 2nd Place Event/Contest Winner- X-Mas Event Participant- Hero- Summer Special Donor- Summer Special Participant- Have Seijin On Your Friends List- Have Onida On Your Friend's List- Have an Admin as a friend!- Have aeluri On Your Friend's List- Best GFX Artist Award- Player 
    Lineage : Vassal of the Cosmos
    Position : None
    Posts : 6990
    Guild : Fairy Tail
    Cosmic Coins : 145
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 26,209

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Starlight Maiden
    Second Skill: Valkyrie Summoner
    Third Skill: Moon Goddess Slayer

    Maiden Of Metal  Empty Re: Maiden Of Metal

    Post by Nessa Cordelia Lux 10th June 2019, 7:35 am

    Maiden Of Metal  Pg4YHn3

    Spoiler:


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    Maiden Of Metal  60582_s

    Shen Kadokawa
    Shen Kadokawa

    Administrator- Moderator- Developer/GFX Artist- Main Account- Alignment Shift- Mythical VIP Status- Demon VIP Status- God VIP Status- Dragon VIP Status- Knight VIP Status- Regular VIP Status- VIP- Mythical- Gain An Artifact- Quality Badge Level 1- Quality Badge Level 2- Quality Badge Level 3- God Of Ishgar- Ten Wizard Saint Member- Guild Master- Custom Slayer- God Slayer- Demon Slayer- Legal Guild Ace- Neutral Guild Ace- Z-Rank- Y-Rank- X-Rank- H-Rank- S-Rank- A-Rank- Wanderer- Eevee- EXP Grinder- Jewel Grinder- Job Creator- Working Together- Forever Solo- Christian Minecraft Server- I Have Friends...- Teaming Up!- Limited Edition- Idolize- Unknown Powerhouse- Unknown Legend- The Completionist- Guild Creator- Achiever- Expert Achiever- Buddy Buddy- Obligatory Beach Episode- Shipped- Sticking Around- Loyal to the Bone- Dank Memer- Fan Artist- Taskmaster- Halloween gfx'ers- Halloween Social- Halloween job event participant - Fan Art Contest Participant- Haiku Contest Participant- Richie Rich- Rich- Veteran Level 6- Veteran Level 5- Veteran Level 4- Veteran Level 3- Veteran Level 2- Veteran Level 1- Character History!- Magic Application Approved!- Obtain A Secondary Magic!- Get A Pet!- Character Application Approved!- Complete Your First Job!- Join A Faction!- Tertiary Magic- Supreme Grand Master [5000]- Grand Master [2000]- Master [1000]- Senior [500]- Novice [250]- 3rd Place Event/Contest Winner- Christmas Event Winner- X-Mas Event Participant- Advertisement Achievement Badge- Tournament Participation Badge- Cookie Achievement- Cupcake Achievement- Rainbow Hero- Summer Special Tier 4- Summer Special Tier 3- Summer Special Tier 2- Summer Special Tier 1- Summer Special Donor- Summer Special Participant- 1 Year Anniversary- Player-
    Lineage : Assassin's Shadow
    Position : None
    Faction : The Rune Knights
    Posts : 11951
    Guild : Guildless
    Cosmic Coins : 505
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 27
    Experience : 3,283,767

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Infinite Arcana
    Second Skill: Vox Universum
    Third Skill: Disciple of War

    Maiden Of Metal  Empty Re: Maiden Of Metal

    Post by Shen Kadokawa 24th July 2019, 3:28 am

    Archived at the user's request

    Spoiler:


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