Settling In (Private/Katherine)

There wasn't a single feeling in her body as she followed Ahote down the dark hallways of the fortress. She was numb aside from the stinging left over from the branding that had happened only minutes prior. She walked only as fast as she needed to, prefering to keep her distance from the boy, with her arms wrapped around her waist protectively. It hurt like hell, sure, but it was the only thing keeping her somewhat sane in that moment. The mage needed some reassurance that she was still alive and that this wasn't her personal purgatory.

Ahote stopped in front of a door and wrapped his hand around the knob before pushing it open. What she saw inside made her cringe; it was a disaster. How anybody could live like that baffled her, but she decided not to question it. He led her in, stepping over numerous objects and piles of things. She didn't really want to think about it. He turned once they were in and she stared back at him with a dead expression. He told her not to touch anything, but it wasn't like she really wanted to anyway. She didn't want to do much of anything if she was being honest. Katherine didn't say a word in response to his jabber. Soil his bed? What does he think I am, an animal? Her thoughts didn't show on her face, she only appeared cold and emotionless.
I can't really control how long I'm here now can I? Despite her feelings toward him and her stabbing want to fight him, she nodded. She stayed silent and complied, knowing that he didn't deserve to see her riled anymore than he already had. As she processed what he'd said further, she wondered about something. She hadn't wanted to talk at all, but this was a thing she felt she had to ask.

"What about you?" She asked flatly. "Where will you sleep if I'm in your bed?"

It seemed then that it was quite a good thing that Katherine rarely slept. Often times she found herself going for days without any rest and still functioning properly, well, for the most part.
When she ran into Ahote, she hadn't gotten a wink of sleep in about two weeks, so she felt that that might have had something to do with her irrational behavior in the storage cabin. Whatever it was wasn't important at that moment, however. She found herself exhausted now, more so than she had been in a long while but telling by the current situation and the boy's response... She'd be taking her nights rest standing. If she wasn't allowed on the bed when he was present, that would lead her to believe she must sleep on the floor. Only...there wasn't any floor space clear for her to lay down. Katherine stifled a yawn mingled sigh. She really was sleepy. Considering her current situation though, she couldn't possibly take such a risk as this. He was in control, not her, so she was therefore in no position to ask him for anything at all.

The mage stood by the door, across from Ahote who sat at his desk. She kept staring at him, saying not a single word. She didn't have much she thought was necessary to say anyhow. Another yawn was swallowed and suddenly her stomach growled. Her eyes widened and she blushed, pulling in a sharp breath through her nose. She wrapped her arms tighter around herself, looked at her feet and remained silent, but her starving organs thought to do otherwise. Again came a growl of hunger and Katherine mentally kicked herself. This is what I get neglecting to feed myself for three days... In the dungeons, she hadn't bothered to even look at the food Ahote had made. She'd been too angry at him. But now that she was as calm as she could be considering...she deeply regretted not eating it. She was so hungry that it distracted her from any other pains she was feeling, including the brand on her ribs.

This had to be the perfect situation. She was starved and her body begged for her to shut her eyes for more than five minutes at once; but she was too prideful, or embarrassed rather, to ask for anything. She might croak at this point. While she was still on the fence about taking her own life, she was beginning to think that she was just too tired to really want to do anything about her inner turmoil. She just wanted some food and sleep. Then maybe after she could decide. If she were going to die, she wanted to do it on her own terms; full stomach and well-rested without a single regret... The last goal was impossible to achieve now since she had gathered so many regrets just in the last few hours.

Another rumbling of her stomach came and went, pulling Katherine out of her thoughts and with heavy eyelids, she looked back at the boy before her.

Katherine blinked tiredly. "If you were offended, I apologize. But yes, if you wouldn't mind. I can give you something in return, if you'd like?" The mage almost regretted making the offer; she had no idea what he might ask for, if he asked for anything at all. And if he did, she hoped it was nothing impossible, or worse, inappropriate. Of course, she was in no way expecting that to happen, but it had before and she wanted to be cautious. To be honest, she wasn't sure how old he actually was. Ahote looked fairly young, but his behavior was almost too mature for the numbers she'd tried to place. The question might come off disrespectful, so she opted to save it for a later date.

Heaving a sigh, Katherine gripped her hair and knotted it into a pony tail. She really did need to cut it some; it was getting far too long to manage. Not to mention heavy as all hell. How she had managed to go this long without chopping half of it off baffled her. She wiped her eyes roughly to wake herself a little and stood with her arms crossed.

"So," She started, staring at him slightly more alive than before. "Where to, Master Ahote?"

Katherine smiled brazenly at his reaction and pressed her fingers to her lips to keep from giggling. His annoyance was laughable alone, but the way he went along with what she'd said made it so much harder to supress. However, the tugging it caused in her chest sprung forth shots of pain through her ribs and she winced, the smile she wore faltering slightly but still present. As he walked passed her and out of the room, she tried to hide her amusement, but it only turned into a strange smirk. "Bite? But of course not, Ahote." The mage spoke sweetly, sarcasm dripping between her lips. "You're far too salty for me anyhow..." Smothering another laugh, along with a wince, Katherine followed him down the dark halls of the hell-hole he called 'home'.

They entered a tavern type area and the first thing she noticed was the fireplace. The heat that radiated from it was comforting and she suddenly felt a lot less tired than before. Still exhausted, of course, but more alive. They strode through the room and into the kitchen. He told her to sit, but she didn't much feel like sitting so she leaned against a counter instead and watched him. Bread, rice and an orange... Hm. I haven't had an orange in years.

"What ever works for you, Master Ahote." Deciding to keep up this act she had going, she emphasized 'master' a lot heavier than the other words. The mage really did want to see what he would do about it, since he apparently owned her now. Why not have some fun with it? She could ignore her inner troubles for a bit, couldn't she?

She couldn't comprehend how someone could cut bread so artfully. Thinking that made her feel stupid, but that was all she saw watching Ahote. He turned suddenly and was obviously irritated with her. Oh, so he noticed? How funny... It was clear the word was getting to him and Katherine really didn't want to make him too upset, all she'd wanted was to poke some fun. But as long as he was handling her life in its entirety, she figured then that she best be careful. "You don't like me calling you that?" She dropped her ploy and took on concern of a sort. It felt wrong. She'd been through so much in the last few hours and yet she still felt her true nature pushing its way to the forefront. It was in her really, to be kind and respectful no matter the situation she was in and with each passing second her guilt chewed at her insides, much like her hunger.

Had she not been so reckless coming up the mountain in the first place, all of this wouldn't have happened the way it did. Although...Katherine could appreciate what little good there was to be found. She was warm and about to be fed, albeit by an annoyed...teenager? She still hadn't figured that out, but besides that she was thankful for it at least. There was always something good to be found in a bad situation and she guessed this was it.

Now the mage had to figure out what to do for a good twenty minutes. She kind of figured she wasn't allowed to leave his sight, so wandering wasn't an option. But... That creeping guilt kept seeping in and she felt bad watching him do all of the work. He wasn't a slave, she was, technically. It wouldn't hurt to offer... "Um, would you like some help maybe?" She hoped it hadn't come off as an insult, but she was bored and guilt-stricken.

One's true nature wasn't something you could just get rid of, hence her sudden change in behavior. It might seem weird to anyone else but her and that worried her a little. Absently, she crossed her arms under her chest-

"Ah- Ow..." She hissed through her teeth and was reminded once again that she had a fresh injury underneath the shirt she wore. She tried her hand at healing it a little to no avail. The stinging wouldn't fade in the slightest and she could only hope that it would eventually.

Katherine took his denial in stride, but the stinging of her fresh brand made her eyes water. He was right, it was probably best that she didn't move, but yet she still would. Temporarily ignoring her modesty, she lifted her shirt to inspect the burn just below her left breast and pressed on the lace bra cup to see it better. The lines were red and angry and she could feel the heat radiating off of them. The image was of a basilisk head but inbetween the details a pale blue could be seen developing. The mage moved to touch it gingerly and was filled with immediate regret. Through gritted teeth came a groan of pain and she mentally slapped herself. She let down her shirt and leaned onto the counter more, supporting her weight with her elbows as she held her head in her hands.

The bright red strands of her bangs hung in front of her eyes as did those of her make-shift ponytail drape down her back and sweep across the backs of her knees. Much time was needed for her to completely cool off but she was beginning to feel a whole lot calmer, despite the agony her injuries caused. While her stomach growled impatiently, she felt her eyelids become heavier until she kept jolting herself awake. She slipped down, her elbows faltering under her weight until she felt her forehead smack on the cold countertop. Her body hunched over itself and she held her skull as it ached from the impact, now making for three sources of discomfort. The concussion Ahote had given her was still prevalent of course, but she was so tired she'd nearly forgotten it. The smacking of her head on the counter didn't make the migraine she had any better.

Her eyes watered and she mumbled to herself, "Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry... You aren't a baby..." She'd gotten a little dizzy then and stumbled a bit, but caught herself on the edge before she could fall. Katherine really wasn't in her best state in that moment and she was a little embarrassed that Ahote was there to witness her folly. Sure he'd caused a good amount of it and he probably enjoyed seeing her discomfort, but she didn't care much for showing her weakness.

"Come on, get your shit together." she said to herself and shook out her hands to wake herself up. It didn't work very well, but it did something. Every moment she made caused her to wince when pain shot through her, so she stopped moving and just held her hands infront of herself to keep steady. She decided against closing her eyes for fear that she might doze off again and kept her gaze forward, indirectly at Ahote.

The woman was honestly suprised when he treated her with concern despite how irritated his eyes said he was. What little sight she had was fairly blurry and the feeling of his hand on her jaw was unreal, like it wasn't actually there, only she knew for a fact that it was. When he asked her to identify the source of her pain, she wasn't sure how to reply. A good many things hurt in that moment, but she guessed he meant her head, seeing as that was what she'd hit so abruptly. With a shaky sigh she spoke up.

"I- Sorry, I started to fall asleep." She said tiredly, her voice unnaturally quiet and a little hoarse. She lifted her hand to her forehead and pushed back her bangs to reveal a red splotch on the skin. "My hand slipped and..." The mark throbbed terribly and she wanted to touch it, but she knew if she did it would only make it hurt worse. How many times had she hit her head now? She thought it was two, but it seriously felt like many more.

Katherine began to tear up, which annoyed her, but it wasn't for emotional reasons. Her head felt like it was filled with rocks, hot ones that when she moved even a little bit seared the inside of her skull. The amount of pain she'd had inflicted on her in such a short period was like nothing she had ever experienced before and she just wanted it to stop. Stop for her own well-being, but also because it was becoming a burden for Ahote. Of course, he'd taken on the responsibility, but she really didn't intend to make it any more difficult than she already had.

"I don't mean to be needy...I-" A heady wave of nausea rushed over her and she shut her eyes tightly. She let out a breath through her mouth. "I think I need to sit down..." But she didn't. The mage kept standing and waited for him to say or do something because maybe he didn't want her to rest. Or maybe he did, just so he wouldn't have to hear her talk or cry anymore, but she didn't know so she just stood there woozy and disoriented.

Suddenly, as if not on her own accord, Katherine pulled his hand away. Staring him in the eyes she said, "Actually, don't make yourself take care of me. I know you don't want to. Go back to what you were doing and I'll deal with this myself." She blinked. "Somehow. I'll figure something out."

Katherine's sickly pale cheeks turned hot with a blush of embarrassment. No matter how angry his words might have made her, she knew she needed to keep her cool, if not just for the sake of her own comfort, then for his favor if it were possible to ever recieve it. All of this was just mind over matter, so if she could push down her pain and sudden need to throw up... She took a slow, deep breath and focused her attention on him and him alone. Nothing else, she wouldn't think about anything else...

"I won't whine. I won't fight you. Whatever you want as payment, information most likely, I can provide it. I'm denying your help now, not for my own sake, but yours in a weird way because I know you really don't want me here. She said all of this and felt winded but continued anyway. "So...do you have a knife I could borrow and a quiet place I could take up? I do feel that you might not want to see my method of dealing with this. Unless of course...you enjoy watching people kill themselves?" Her voice, while raspy and quiet, was very serious in tone. She did know that if she tried to leave Basilisk Fang she would be killed, so getting out of his hair would be much easier if she took liberties into her own hands. "Oh, and whatever you wanted to know before, it might be best to ask now so I can tell you. I won't be able to later." The thought itself was sad, but only to her for all she knew. Katherine felt like she was stuck on a high fence, rocking back and forth between two sides and wondering which she'd fall into. One side was filled with sharp teeth-like rocks, the other was a safe haven. The worst part was though...she didn't know which side was which. Which side was living and which side was dying.

Her body swayed on the edge of the 'fence' she stood upon and the weight of it took her down until she landed on the softer side. She was surprised; it hadn't been her death, but staying alive that was the better option. Katherine's eyes widened and her brows scrunched together at his words. He was right about one thing so far, she really didn't like him at all. Then he laid his hand on her head and she frowned. He rubbed the spot, but wouldn't look at her as he talked. The only thing on her agenda now, as he'd said, was to hush up, eat and go to bed.

"Um, sure." Was all she could get out. She was generally speechless and stood stiffly, digesting everything that had just happened. He wasn't allowing her to kill herself even though she annoyed him, which was something she couldn't really comprehend. She'd gotten the impression that he wouldn't have cared if she died, by her own hand or by another's. They'd only known each other for less than a day and he'd said she was worthless, that no one would care if she disappeared, that the world was better off without her and yet... Here he was. Patting her head and telling her not to kill herself. What kind of backwards shit is this? She thought, but was now too bothered by the entire situation to even contemplate suicide. Oddly, her heart pounded in her chest but she didn't feel like crying a single tear. She was more confused than anything else.

Katherine stood stiffly with furrowed brows as he pat her cheek and handed her a plate before he left her to follow his brief instructions. She stared down at the dish's contents, not really looking at it but into space. The mage kept trying over and over again to understand all that had just happened but she still couldn't wrap her mind around it. After a few moments of standing alone in the kitchen she shook off her stupor, carefully this time, and followed her memory's map to his room.

Once she'd gotten to his room, she wasn't sure where she was supposed to sit but eventually decided to take a seat at the end of the bed. With the plate in her lap and finally being at a complete state of rest, she took a breather. She picked at the rice and tore the bread into tiny pieces, popping the shreds into her mouth slowly and without thought. After what had come to be almost a day, and felt like too many at once, she was by herself again. Surprisingly, she didn't find herself enjoying the solace much. She was struck with an overwhelming loneliness that bothered her to her core. For going so long without any human interaction, finally receiving some, and screwing it so royally... It was like a pit had opened up in her gut that wanted to swallow her whole, but because it was inside all it could do was suck up her innards until she was empty and just a shell of a young woman, lost and purposeless and waiting for something good to come and save her. Because it was obvious by this point that she couldn't be her own hero anymore.

Katherine had been sitting in silence, in the darkness of the room for more than an hour. Maybe less, maybe more. She'd lost track of any concept of time. With the now empty dish in her hands, she left it on his desk like he'd asked and crawled onto the bed like a child. One looking for comfort where there was none. She laid herself in the middle, not bothering to pull up the covers, and rested her head on the pillows. A bed like this had become a rarity for her and she tried to let herself get comfortable, but just the feeling of it reminded her of where she was and what had happened. What she'd done. Her fingers gripped the comforter that was trapped underneath her and she exhaled heavily with a slight shake. Katherine had thought she was done crying, but apparently that was not the case. One could always use a good, lonely cry whether they wanted it or not and that was what she'd have as she laid in a stranger's bed with a new, terrifying life ahead of her.

[Exit]