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    Black Death

    Susumu
    Susumu

    Player 
    Lineage : Knight of Frostfire
    Position : None
    Posts : 14
    Guild : None
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 0

    Black Death Empty Black Death

    Post by Susumu 2nd November 2017, 12:49 pm

    Magic

    Primary Magic: Black Death
    Secondary Magic: (Must be filled in later. Magic you trained for goes here)
    Caster or Holder: Caster
    Description: Black Death allows Susumu to manipulate rotting miasma and destroy anything by using it. This miasma takes the form of a black mist that will destroy things in contact, but it has a clear weakness; it can't destroy anything infused with magical energy, be it spells or magic users, they are immune to the immediate destruction it causes. It can still cause damage, but it's not destructive enough to rot things in a matter of seconds. Susumu prefers to use the environment itself to cause damage, rotting walls, cliffs, roofs, floors and anything available, knowing that it would be useless to try using it on things that have magic energy infused with them. It's a strong magic for strategic purposes, but it has its weaknesses. Also, users of both dark and light magic are immune to all of its spells, effects, and abilities, and they can't receive damage from it either. That can be exploited by those immune to its effects.

    Strengths:

    • Susumu can reconstruct materials that he destroyed with his miasma, allowing him to use a unique form of Molding Magic. He can use any solid material for that purpose. This also allows for him to fuse with foreign material by destroying and rebuilding them in his own body, and with it, he can create extra members (arms, legs, eyes, etc) and appendages (wings, claws, tails, etc).
    • By using this reconstruction ability, he can heal himself and others by applying the miasma on the wound. However, it needs spells that depend on the rank of the user, and he needs to cause damage first in order to reconstruct something.

    Weaknesses:

    • His rotting miasma is a universal element for all slayers; they can eat it to fuel their abilities, regardless of their elements.
    • Susumu can't rot items or elements fused with magic energy. This leaves the user defenseless against magic spells, considering its weakness, as any defensive spell would be useless. He needs to use strategy and evasion in order to cope with it.
    • This needs physical contact with something for the spell to function; they need a transceiver, something solid, for it to be effective. Because of this need for a solid transceiver, it means that he can't use his spells with gases or liquids, only solid matter.

    Lineage: Knight of Frostfire
    Unique Abilities:
    Spoiler:


    Last edited by Susumu on 5th November 2017, 6:02 am; edited 13 times in total
    Susumu
    Susumu

    Player 
    Lineage : Knight of Frostfire
    Position : None
    Posts : 14
    Guild : None
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 0

    Black Death Empty Re: Black Death

    Post by Susumu 2nd November 2017, 12:56 pm

    Bump.

    Also, going without spells. I want to learn them for plot purposes.
    Lilium
    Lilium

    Player 
    Posts : 816
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 6

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: αєgιѕ - тнє мιи∂
    Second Skill: муѕтι¢ - тнє вσ∂у
    Third Skill: ραиα¢єα - тнє ѕσυℓ

    Black Death Empty Re: Black Death

    Post by Lilium 2nd November 2017, 6:41 pm

    Hello there Susumu! My name is Hikari and I'm the mod who will be assisting you with editing and developing your magic so that's within the site's systems. My comments will be made with this gorgeous color and without further ado, let's get started shall we?

    Susumu wrote:Magic

    Primary Magic: Black Death
    Secondary Magic: (Must be filled in later. Magic you trained for goes here)
    Caster or Holder: Caster
    Description: Black Death allows Susumu to manipulate rotting miasma and destroy anything by using it. This miasma takes the form of a black mist that will destroy things in contact, but it has a clear weakness; it can't destroy anything infused with magical energy, be it spells or magic users, they are immune to the immediate destruction it causes. It can still cause damage, but it's not destructive enough to rot things in a matter of seconds. Susumu prefers to use the environment itself to cause damage, rotting walls, cliffs, roofs, floors and anything available, knowing that it would be useless to try using it on things that have magic energy infused with them. It's a strong magic for strategic purposes, but it has its weaknesses. Also, users of both dark and light magic are immune to all of its spells, effects, and abilities, and they can't receive damage from it either. That can be exploited by those immune to its effects.

    Strengths:

    • It can rot anything that isn't fueled by magic energy almost immediately, but he needs time and energy to rot anything greater than 10 meters. Rotting 20 meters of matter, for example, takes approximately 500 MP and 1,000 posts for each meter destroyed.
    • It grants him immunity to all diseases of natural causes. However, diseases caused by magic spells are still fully functional, and they can infect his body. This is also a weakness since his immune system isn't prepared for new infections (Plot only).


    These strengths are very unique so I'd save them for future UAs and such. The reason I say this is because these strengths are much more similar to UAs then actual strengths of the magic. When we ask for strengths, it is asking for the general strengths of the magic as a whole, and not specific abilities. So, try to change these current strengths that describe some things your magic is good at. (General ones could be like cannot be eaten by slayers, or works well in a closed area.)

    Weaknesses:

    • Magic users are half-immune to the effects of this magic. They take 1/3 of damage, and their spells can't be destroyed as well. This also means that his defensive spells are useless against offensive spells of any type. He must avoid them by manual evasion.
    • Users of light and dark elements can't be affected by this magic in any way. But they can still deal damage against Susumu, so he is unable to fight against them with magic, and he must use field strategy and physical combat to deal with it by himself.
    • His immune system is completely weak due to his magic, and thus, any acquired diseases that were caused by spells, he can't fight the infections, and his body would die immediately. Healing magic can counterattack it, but only if used by another person.

    Lineage: Knight of Frostfire
    Unique Abilities:
    Spoiler:

    *So, while these two abilities are fine, you can play around with percentages instead of simply just doing flat amounts of HP and MP. (Especially since HP scales per rank)
    There is a set limit to the amount of HP regen and MP regen you have per post so I'd refer to this for a basis for what you can play around with in terms of regeneration amounts.

    Very lovely magic you have here. When you have made edits and are ready to have this reviewed again, bump the thread and I will get back to you as soon as possible~


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Black Death QOmg1XE


    Susumu
    Susumu

    Player 
    Lineage : Knight of Frostfire
    Position : None
    Posts : 14
    Guild : None
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 0

    Black Death Empty Re: Black Death

    Post by Susumu 4th November 2017, 6:15 pm

    Done.

    I hope its good enough.
    Lilium
    Lilium

    Player 
    Posts : 816
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 6

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: αєgιѕ - тнє мιи∂
    Second Skill: муѕтι¢ - тнє вσ∂у
    Third Skill: ραиα¢єα - тнє ѕσυℓ

    Black Death Empty Re: Black Death

    Post by Lilium 4th November 2017, 6:58 pm

    Susumu wrote:Magic

    Primary Magic: Black Death
    Secondary Magic: (Must be filled in later. Magic you trained for goes here)
    Caster or Holder: Caster
    Description: Black Death allows Susumu to manipulate rotting miasma and destroy anything by using it. This miasma takes the form of a black mist that will destroy things in contact, but it has a clear weakness; it can't destroy anything infused with magical energy, be it spells or magic users, they are immune to the immediate destruction it causes. It can still cause damage, but it's not destructive enough to rot things in a matter of seconds. Susumu prefers to use the environment itself to cause damage, rotting walls, cliffs, roofs, floors and anything available, knowing that it would be useless to try using it on things that have magic energy infused with them. It's a strong magic for strategic purposes, but it has its weaknesses. Also, users of both dark and light magic are immune to all of its spells, effects, and abilities, and they can't receive damage from it either. That can be exploited by those immune to its effects.

    Strengths:

    • It makes the user's skin and eyes immune to poisonous and venomous materials, as long he does not inhale the venomous gases or leaves any wound where it can enter. If it ends up inside his body by these means, he will get poisoned anyways.
    • Susumu can deal more damage with Black Death while using his spells inside any dark guild. For example, if one of his spells is dealing 20% worth of damage (20 HP), it will deal an extra 5% worth of damage (25 HP) with this strength in mind.


    The first strength falls under the category of immunities which have been disallowed on site. You can word it so that it only works in plot purposes if you still want to have a strength like this. So basically non-PvP elements. The second one is just more damage to a certain type so this will not do as a strength. Just make them general strengths, like perks to the magic

    Weaknesses:

    • His rotting miasma is a universal element for all slayers; they can eat it to fuel their abilities, regardless of their elements.
    • Susumu can't rot items or elements fused with magic energy. This leaves the user defenseless against magic spells, considering its weakness, as any defensive spell would be useless. He needs to use strategy and evasion in order to cope with it.
    • This needs physical contact with something for the spell to function; they need a transceiver, something solid, for it to be effective. Because of this need for a solid transceiver, it means that he can't use his spells with gases or liquids, only solid matter.

    Lineage: Knight of Frostfire
    Unique Abilities:
    Spoiler:

    Sorry if it seems I'm picking. But you are a couple simple changes away from having your magic done! Please bump the thread again when it's ready to be graded.


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Black Death QOmg1XE


    Susumu
    Susumu

    Player 
    Lineage : Knight of Frostfire
    Position : None
    Posts : 14
    Guild : None
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 0

    Black Death Empty Re: Black Death

    Post by Susumu 5th November 2017, 6:05 am

    Done.
    Lilium
    Lilium

    Player 
    Posts : 816
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 6

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: αєgιѕ - тнє мιи∂
    Second Skill: муѕтι¢ - тнє вσ∂у
    Third Skill: ραиα¢єα - тнє ѕσυℓ

    Black Death Empty Re: Black Death

    Post by Lilium 5th November 2017, 7:14 am

    Spoiler:

    Black Death 3gvMyfo


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Black Death QOmg1XE



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