So, it's no secret that my activity as of late has been abysmal, if not to call it near non-existent. And frankly, I thought it would pass somehow, somewhere soon, but as you can see, this has been dragging on for months. Lately, I've even felt it increasing even so, as I can't even find myself able to even write down a single paragraph at this moment.
Not that I don't know what to write, it's just that I can't seem to actually write it down when the moment's there. It bothers me. And no doubt, it is doing the same to those having waited all these months for an answer that did not come. So it's time to be honest with myself as well and admit the reason why; I don't feel it. Lately I've been feeling useless beyond belief; both here on site, for my family irl, and lately, even at work. Nevermind the self-inflicted guilt driving me crazy when I try to force myself to recognize how much I've been procrastinating and postponing writing my posts, the promises I make yet in the end can't seem to fulfill, I've started burning out way too fast. I crash as soon as I get home, and any free time is usually usurped being unable to focus or decide what to do. In short, I'm feeling like shit, and I can't seem to get any better. And now I've finally hit the point of losing both my appetite and the feeling of hunger, I think it's time I finally come and spill the beans so you at least know what exactly has been keeping me away and offline. Because frankly, I hate doing this. And I can't keep on wearing my happy façade forever. It's too damn tiring.
Knowing how things go however, I'll be going on a semi-hiatus until further notice. Not a full one, because I know my muse might uppercut me two days from now and it might seem like a big ol' scam. I'll post if I can find the time and motivation, but don't get your hopes up much. It might be quick, but it might also take a hell of a lot of time. I might just also vanish for a while without a word.
I'll leave everyone I'm in threads with the freedom to decide whether to continue, cancel, or to put them on hold. I'd just like a heads up in case of the latter two.
For those who have been so patient through it all, and for those in the future; thank you for putting up with my shit up till now.
This applies to all my alt accounts as well, @Kitalpha Aurence @Albafica Temero, @Pandora Dagger
Not that I don't know what to write, it's just that I can't seem to actually write it down when the moment's there. It bothers me. And no doubt, it is doing the same to those having waited all these months for an answer that did not come. So it's time to be honest with myself as well and admit the reason why; I don't feel it. Lately I've been feeling useless beyond belief; both here on site, for my family irl, and lately, even at work. Nevermind the self-inflicted guilt driving me crazy when I try to force myself to recognize how much I've been procrastinating and postponing writing my posts, the promises I make yet in the end can't seem to fulfill, I've started burning out way too fast. I crash as soon as I get home, and any free time is usually usurped being unable to focus or decide what to do. In short, I'm feeling like shit, and I can't seem to get any better. And now I've finally hit the point of losing both my appetite and the feeling of hunger, I think it's time I finally come and spill the beans so you at least know what exactly has been keeping me away and offline. Because frankly, I hate doing this. And I can't keep on wearing my happy façade forever. It's too damn tiring.
Knowing how things go however, I'll be going on a semi-hiatus until further notice. Not a full one, because I know my muse might uppercut me two days from now and it might seem like a big ol' scam. I'll post if I can find the time and motivation, but don't get your hopes up much. It might be quick, but it might also take a hell of a lot of time. I might just also vanish for a while without a word.
I'll leave everyone I'm in threads with the freedom to decide whether to continue, cancel, or to put them on hold. I'd just like a heads up in case of the latter two.
For those who have been so patient through it all, and for those in the future; thank you for putting up with my shit up till now.
This applies to all my alt accounts as well, @Kitalpha Aurence @Albafica Temero, @Pandora Dagger
Last edited by Aura on 12th October 2019, 8:54 am; edited 1 time in total