❖ PUMPKIN PICKING GONE WRONG ❖ (E/Iris/Aeluri)

While Iris was less concerned about dirt in and of itself, he was also very fussy about his appearance. There was nothing worse than getting a perfectly beautiful outfit ruined, and Iris had no such thing as old clothes he could wear for the messier tasks. Even the shirts and pants he had that were ripped were like that in the name of fashion, but no muddy stain could ever be called fashion in his book. Paint splatters? Sure. He'd even allow some blood spatter when the situation called for it. But food spillage? Mud? Dirt? No way. He had an image to uphold, so Iris Esperanza was having none of that nonsense. His vow to uphold and appreciate true beauty wouldn't allow him to slum it with the hogs.

The lilacette walked nearby his friends, one hand in the pocket of his tight black jeans while the other was slightly elevated and gently wiggling its fingers. He'd had to roll the sleeves of his slouchy, blush-pink sweater up so his hands would be free to 'work', and despite the chill in the air, Iris didn't seem to mind that one of his shoulders was bare. A thin stream of water was snaking along in the air with no shortage of elegance, snapping vines off of pumpkins and wrapping around them for transport to the cart. Why dirty himself when he had more than enough magic to do the task for him? His hands were much better suited for...other activities. Setting his sights on one of the larger pumpkins in the patch, he produced another water whip, straining his magic muscles just a little to get his water to lift the hulking thing into the air and plot it into the cart.

"I'm doing great~," Iris purred easily, pleased with his collection of gourds, "Though, I do wonder why they don't have farmers out doing this. Isn't this part of their job?" the space entity mused, the water he controlled splashing to wet the dry ground as he released it. Hands now went to a bag at his side, rustling through it, obviously looking for a drink. He hardly went anywhere without some alcohol, as he felt his best while drunk. Too bad he didn't pay attention to the bottle he grabbed. Taking a big swig of some Witch's Brew he'd purchased for kicks at the Autumn Solstice festival, his lips only had time to do a pleased smack before he realized something wasn't right. Wide purple eyes peered up at Ahote and Aelu, blinking in confusion. Why were they so...so big? He opened his mouth to ask about the change in perspective, and was horrified when only a deep, loud CROAK came out. Eyes darting around, he started to put the pieces together. His friends hadn't grown, he had shrunk! Webbed feet the hue of algae were spread wide over a puddle of his clothes. Terror rocked him. His gorgeous outfit was laying on this musty old ground of the patch! He instinctively tried to shriek, but instead, only another alarmed croak sounded, as ugly as he currently was. Iris had been turned into a disgusting frog, and he couldn't even shapeshift out of it!


[536/1500]

Unamused by their amusement, frog Iris croaked again moodily, purple eyes looking strange and pissed within the swamp-water-hued amphibian's sockets. Laughter. They were laughing at him! Would he have laughed at one of them if they'd turned? Despite the answer probably being yes, in his embarrassed state he refused to acknowledge it, instead presuming he'd be horrified by their appearance and lament the loss of their beauty with concern and tears. What was amusing about his clothes being ruined by grime and his complexion becoming so slimy and cold? Traitors! They could at least try to help him turn back if they even knew how to do something like that!

He'd been in the process of cursing both of them out in animated froganese when he was nearly swooped up by, from his perspective, gigantic black talons! There was more shrill croaking in terror, but thankfully Aelu's magnificent, bi-headed cat was there to save him. Never had he felt such affection for the freed creature, but as much as he enjoyed some pain, being eaten alive as a frog by a murder of crows sounded surprisingly unappetizing. Cowering under the feline, he watched in trepidation as even more frog-eating birds lifted as a mass from the trees, coming straight for them with malicious intent. This wasn't normal for Earthland birds, right? Was this patch magically protected or something?

He couldn't see much through the shadow cast by his protector, and frankly, he didn't want to look. In the shape he was in, this was his biggest shame. If he could have shrunk even smaller and blended into the dirt, he would have. It hurt his feelings that he couldn't shift himself back, leaving him to consider what it was he had drunk. Okay! From here on out, no more drinking the shady concoctions of human festival peddlers. They couldn't be trusted not to make him absolutely useless and hideous. His verdant, permeable flesh paled at the thought that this could be permanent, nearly sending him into some froggy hysterics in the midst of mass crow death and reanimation into another creature. So wrapped up in his own condition was the former space dust that he hardly noticed Ahote destroying the undead mashup of feathered corpses. Massive tears formed in his bulging eyes, rolling into the wide crease of his croaking lips before falling the short distance to the ground.

It seemed his croaky sobs were for nothing, though. After only a few more seconds, there was a puff of sparkly smoke and a very naked Iris was laying on his belly under Aeluri's large cat. Not wanting to smush and sully his outfit anymore, he scrambled from beneath the feline, jumping to his feet with a whoop of celebration. He opened his mouth to speak, but there was only a tremendous, horrifying croak. Falling into horrified silence, the man carefully cleared his throat and tried again. "Testing.." he said, this time free of any lingering defective alcohol effects. "Oh, I'm me again~~ Glorious, stunning me!" the violette celebrated, though it was somewhat short-lived. As happy as he was that he was back in his human form, his ideal standard for beauty, he was also embarrassed and generally pissed off at the whole debacle. The potion had made him ugly and the birds had tried to eat him. The birds were dead, but he had to release this anger on something! Lilac eyes shifted instantly to crimson ones, sobering his face and even gifting him a frown. They landed on the scarecrow with the scythe that dared approach them before they could leave. Well, if he was just going to have to fight these filthy possessed farm frequenters, there was no sense in getting dressed. He had no plans to destroy his clothes in a mindless fight today.

Lurching forward like a man possessed, Iris's nude frame zipped across the patch on a stream of water manifesting from under his feet. As he approached, red laser beams shot from his eyes to scorch out the already glowing center of the straw creature, though that did little to make him falter. Raising the scythe, it seemed the patch guardian would fight just as recklessly, so the two madmen would throw themselves into combat. Did Iris need to fight it in such close proximity? Not at all, but as usual, he had an ulterior motive. "The least you can do is make me feel good after you failed to keep the crows from trying to eat me~" he purred, voice low and dangerous. He slipped in close enough for the curved blade to rake over the flesh of his shoulder, causing him to quiver and sigh. But alas, it wasn't good enough. "Is that all?" he asked with no shortage of disappointment, droplets of water gathering around him to await command. The cosmic being would only dance with the scarecrow for a few more moments, blood splattering and straw flying as he gave the mindless thing a chance to impress him. When it utterly failed to capture his attention, the water droplets flew forward like a hail of bullets, ripping it to shreds which he then incinerated with his hellish hues.

Now much calmer, his eyes returned to their favored purple and his bare feet padded back toward the pair he left behind, carefully stepping over any pumpkins that might still be intact. "I wonder if this field is done with us yet?" he asked as if he hadn't just gone ham on his enemy, and as if it was perfectly normal to be standing butt naked in the middle of a pumpkin patch with his closest friends. It was nothing Aeluri hadn't already seen many times over, and perhaps he forgot that their more restrained companion was less used to certain freedoms.

A novel couldn't have done a better job foreshadowing the last threat rolling in with the fog. No, it wouldn't seem the field was done with them at all.


[1535/1500 || Iris event wc complete]