(Don't worried by the size, I've gone out of my way to be extremely cooperative. If you see a mini rant, usually spoilered, it's something that in the end was unneeded and can be skipped, as I worked through or around the problems that came up.)
• Error.
Disagreement or inability to make a change. (Nothing has this anymore. While this post has been waiting to be posted for so long, I eventually worked on each to turn them blue or green.)• Uncertainty.
In which I ask a question or Corrections may have been made one way or another but could go either way.• Probably good to go.
I've made changes, most likely the changes as requested, and it should be all clear.This is mostly for me to keep track of this stuff as this will probably take me quite some time to go through because A) It's a lot, even excessively so. B) It's highly demotivating for a number of reasons that make it hard to work on.
In some cases I may have forgotten to make any changes I stated, due to taking a while to go over everything and something could have slipped in the days following. I'm pretty sure, however, that I got everything I said as I've gone through the list a few times.
I feel much more cooperative lately (and was able to capitalize on this feeling, by turning a few Red marked things into blues and greens.), so trying to post this as soon as possible now...
•
Blinding Recovery;
Once per hit needs to be changed to once per post.
Signature spells are meant to be spammy and not have cooldowns but that would be overpowered for a healing spell so I attributed it to once per hit instead which results in being incapable of casting it whenever I wish, relying instead on having suffered damage, and would effectively be similar to having an x HP barrier.
But I wont drag this issue out, I'll just change it to a normal healing spell 1/post. (As yeah, healing spells shouldn't be spammy without some form of usage limitation, though that doesn't always have to be cooldowns)
•
Halt;
Full range, full damage, every time instead of once per post. Gonna ask you lower damage to 25%, or make it only activate once per post for full damage. Unless you'd prefer to lower range to a lower number (10 meters) and keep it as is.
Once per post for full damage sounds fine, I'll go with that. Each time it triggers in the same post it could be cut in half for even less damage potential overall in some moments, but more reliable and not too awful.
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Dune God's Concentrated Might;
You can keep all three if you lower the numbers to each one by 25%. Or you can remove one of them and keep the other two as is.
Three? It's only two.
Oh, the velocity. That's just a side effect of Range. Range and speed have always been linked on this site in the past, I don't see why they'd not be related now.
But I'd rather not make a fuss about it, I'll just get rid of the speed.
•
Dune God's Ascendant Bellow;
http://prntscr.com/gy7kjz
Putting this here for reference as I go.
The damage you have the spell at, with absolutely no charge, is 125. Where H rank base damage is 140. Charge spells are supposed to be considerably weaker when not charged at all. Not to mention the first round of charging adds 75 damage overall to it, which is a 60% increase to it with one charge. You then have it increase by 25% more with each post after that. While I get you were trying for a 'useful' H rank damage spell, I believe you went about it the wrong way. They are meant to go from 'meh' to 'oh shit' once fully charged, with varying degrees between it. This goes from 'ow' to 'oh shit' in a single post. I would suggest lowering the base damage to 100 total. Your choice on how it's split, and then add 40% per charge to the overall damage, splitting the extra damage evenly. This makes it weaker at first but then makes it way stronger in the end. Proper charge spell at that point.
A rant about the ridiculousness of Charged spells, that you can completely ignore.
I've changed it as you described / asked.
However I have also made it a multi-hit spell, since I noticed that the spell rules even use Beam as an example of a multi-hit. So it seemed appropriate. I further reduced the damage of this from the 100 damage you requested, down to 75 damage.
- Spoiler:
Charged spells are supposed to be weaker but considerably weaker is awfully silly.
You realize how many attacks you could get off in one post? Why on earth would you waste a full post to increase the damage by anything less than 100%, since you could have just cast multiple posts in the one post, and any number of spells in the posts you wasted charging the one spell? That's insanity, especially when the damage is so low in the first place which diminishes the power of percent based damage increase.
This is something I tried to talk over when these rules were being added but I was assured it was fine and it'd work out and but the charge rules have only seemed to keep getting worse ever since, and I tried to get across that wasting full posts to charge would mean the damage potential would have to be at least comparable to attacking and fighting normally in the time spent charging. Which is why I managed to get the rules changed before they were posted to not include measurements in posts, allowing for charge ups to occur during the post they are used while charge ups that take posts would be significantly more powerful. The vagueness of the rule was a compromise intended to just be the guideline that it is. But since then it seems people have taken it to only be a little more powerful, and require full posts.
Yeah, it's supposed to go from "ow" to Oh shit. It's an H-rank damage spell, and Charging for 1 post is already a massive time-cost sink. To think about it rationally, a whole post wasted "Charging" a spell while everyone else does whatever they please.
Spending a whole post charging only to deal the damage anyone else would deal without charging in an instant + other spells and attacks they would have also done, anyone would be a fool to ever use a charged spell.
Not to mention this an RP site, no one wants to essentially write nothing for multiple posts in a row for a single not-very-special effect.
Consider this a Suggestion as though I posted it in the Suggestion section, though as I'm sure nothing would come of that I wont bother.
I knew the rules on charged spells and I admit I was hoping that they would be treated more as the guidelines they are especially with this spell being an H-rank, which are massive grey areas on their own right.
Most people don't make offensive H-ranks because it's massively underwhelming and pointless when you can get vastly more damage or general usage by making your H-rank spell Support. Support magic and buffs are king on this forum but I really wanted to try to break the mold.
•
Sahara Cyclone;
You can't judge damage based on seconds. This isn't a MOBA, nor is it Dungeons and Dragons. It's an RP forum. One post does not have a set amount of time. You can say they deal 1/4 their normal physical damage, but you can't say per second as one post could be eight, another could be a minute. Basing it on time makes it to abusable. Add that to the size of the creature, which is ridiculously huge, and this is even more abusable. You can have it be burst range sized according to its rank, 100 meters, but you may want to rethink how you are doing the physical damage. The base description should not have anything special in it for summons. That's why they have 2 abilities.
Active: Definitely need to lower it's size, as you want to deal full spell damage inside of it when it runs out or is killed. If you wish to keep this it definitely needs to be lowered to the 100-meter size.
Passive; Choose one, if you choose the pull you'll need to say how strong the pull is in meters per post, else people get to choose for themselves. If you choose to keep the damage you can raise it to B rank damage per post, as long as you lower the creature to 100 meters.
Exactly, this isn't a Moba or Dungeons and dragons as you've said. It's RP. Which is an emulation of a real, though fictional, world in which time works just as it does for us. You know perfectly well that putting your hand into a lake and pulling it back out would be roughly around three seconds.
It makes more sense to measure by actual time than it is to measure by posts.
But I have to admit you're the first person to convince me on this point, while it IS more reliable and accurate to measure by time, it is also more
abusable. Unless the duration was also measured in time, which since it isn't here and that would be too much to suggest, you are absolutely right and I agree. Saying eight seconds = x damage is alright at its core, but it's the surrounding elements and how some things are measured in posts that makes it cumbersome.
I'll fix it into something more appropriate (and not based on time).
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Burst is a Radius, not a Diameter. If you have a Burst spell it's usually an instantaneous effect like a dash, in which case the Burst radius is the 360 directions you might travel and a shorter range to limit a teleport to, while Burst also covers a "Burst", the 360 directions around you of a burst-like effect.
Which is why it is half the area of an AoE, because a Burst is an AoE range, centered on yourself. In other words all Burst is is an AOE that's centered on you.
Which I think I thought was 300/150 meters when I made the spell, hence the 300 meter size. Either it's changed, I was wrong, or I don't know what I was thinking at the time. (It HAS been over 90 days since I finished making this magic after all, even longer since I would have made that specific spell).
Have the Ranges been reduced recently?
Anyway. I'll cut it back to an appropriate AOE size for sure.
ALSO with that in mind I've also reduced some other ranges here and there within this post being worked on without being asked.
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What do you mean by pick one? It's a single ability and effect, the cyclone is, well, a cyclone. It's winds pull people towards the center with s-rank force, as it is an s-rank effect. That force will naturally result in damage, because all damage is is the transfer of force, though of course it's just an afterthought here, and any damage results from collisions which I say can result in C-rank damage per post, not that it does result in C-rank damage per post. It's one of those moments where I include a bit of proper detail where most would shrug it off but I tend to be as thorough as I can be.
I fail to see what choices there even are to "pick from" as it is just the single effect of high winds.
I will remove the C-rank damage as it was an afterthought anyway inserted only to make things make more sense. Though I believe it's also very underpowered without that damage as most people tend to ignore things like "Strong winds pulling you" because "Lol, my character is too badass for that."
In other words, I'm doing just as you've asked on this one too. I just talk too much.
•
Piercing Scarab;
Active: Need to choose one effect or the other.
Passive: The beetle needs to have a max range away from you if you want this, as you could do an infinite range using it.
Why would it have to choose.. It's an active spell not a signature spell or a passive, and it can only use this once unlike most actives of summons. *sigh* Okay then.
That makes no sense, it's a summon, not a thrown ball. And you cannot have infinite range if you do not have infinite time and infinite speed. Two which I'd also point out, said Time is only three posts when this is an S-rank summon.
And I'd also point out that the passive says nothing about increasing the duration of any spell meaning even at the maximum usage a spell wont last more than a post if it says its instant which further reduces both the range and extent of the use.
I've edited it very closely to as you asked.
•
Radiant Waltz;
Please remember that Instant, no-cooldown, sigs are once per post and this is fine.
- Spoiler:
Um, that's entirely against the purpose of signature spells. They replace the free use of weapons, and are used as such. There's no once per post cooldown on swinging a sword just as there is supposed to be no such limit on a signature spell, which is the reason for their existence as weapon replacements and why they're supposed to be simple.
No cooldown means no cooldown and are balanced by their simplicity or other key aspects that provide that balance, which in this case was saying how there's a distinct gap where even if spammed frequently there's a reliable opening for anyone to use just like flash step style techniques in any anime ever, where they blink from one spot to another and have that opening where they're stopped as they go to take their next step, in which the enemy strikes and then the action goes on for six more episodes of psuedo drama.
Being a signature spell, and thus something to be used frequently, is why I included such clear and distinct limitations.
⛧ | Short range.
⛧ | It isn't a true teleport. She has to be capable of traveling the distance normally, albeit including any special movement effects and the fact that she can fly. (Non-Earthen physical or energetic obstruction.)
⛧ | Has a 1.5 second "cool down", so there will always be that moment of vulnerability no matter how often she uses it.
⛧ | Indication of the effect having occurred. ie; it's not subtle / hard to miss what happened, which can be an advantage to teleports that have no visible effect resulting in a jarring confusion.
Things can be fun and balanced without being overly limited.
The entire existence for signature spells are for their lack of cooldown, to be used like you would use a Weapon; freely and without limit by default, limitations being added only to balance an otherwise overpowered spell. In this case I included all the above listed Points of Weakness to flesh out the usage of this effect and how one might combat it.
THAT SAID, if it is your personal believe that a Teleportation effect would be too overpowered as a freely used signature spell then I will absolutely concede to that point and be glad to buff the spell but give it a cooldown. (As introducing cooldowns to signature spells was supposed to be a point of balance for concepts that are too strong when used as often as you could swing a sword)
There, now it has a cooldown.
•
Dune God's Golden Rainment;
The flat damage reduction is a no go. You can change it to a %, keeping in mind 50% is max without lineage and 75% with damage resist in lineage, to both and remove the cannot be targeted. Or you can keep the cannot be targeted type by removing the damage increase and making the damage resist follow along the lines I mentioned in the previous sentence. Flat damage increase is generally it's own spell, making it add half or full rank depending on duration/cooldown and other things involved. You want too much for way too long.
I fail to see how it's too much, it doesn't really do a lot, especially for an S-rank support spell and each individual aspect is limited / reduced.
Went with the later suggestion, I've removed the damage mitigation and replaced the weaknesses of the damage mitigation with a limitation on the spending MP to counter attacks, so now the spell doesn't counter the attacks it just guards herself.
Edit- I'm a twit, I just noticed you said removing the damage increase, not the damage decrease. I removed the damage decrease and kept the damage increase... So, making this Green instead of Blue.
•
Sand Shell;
Half your post is so variable and vague that you need to either change to it last for a post or give it a number of words to last. Every post is different, and if you're the first poster and activate it someone could simply post MORE words and negate you even using it that post.
Half post isn't very vague or variable. A post can be of any length but it's always a minimum of whatever is required for the job, and half a post is always half the post regardless of the length.
Measuring things in posts at all is no less vague, measuring things in seconds is more accurate than posts.
Measuring by words would be the most vague.
Ultimately it isn't even a necessary distinction, as the concept remains present.
The duration could remain less than a post but the err seems to be in the description. Perhaps I should remove the reference to posts at all in the description and avoid OOC terminology (as I usually try to do) and simply state "For a short amount of time". Which while variable, RP itself is all about being variable, being all about fluff, style, and writing.
Would that be better?
Or of course I could measure in seconds, as while some people suggest that seconds don't fit RP I highly beg to differ, you're writing a world and inhabiting it in your mind. It's more natural to determine the rough amount of seconds between actions than it is to use something so nebulous and mechanical as "posts" as though they were turns.
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Desert Rose;
Cooldown needs to be 8xNumber of Times Spell Used. It's how chain spells work for that. Plus multiple uses charged up to be used at the same time needs a delay in it. Say, can cast twice per round without sending them out all at once. And as an A rank spell that is working like a shield, on a spell meant to be used in quick succession to be used to full effect. I'm gonna ask you lower the number on hp of them to 65. (80 hp is A rank spell damage. I'm asking for a 19% reduction for being allowed to cast it an infinite amount of times before you put it on cooldown for an ungodly amount of time.)
I'm aware of the cooldown, I made the chained spell rules / concept, and it IS weird I didn't mention it but I believe I may have not mentioned it since it's somewhat fundamental that it didn't even occur to me to make a note of it other than "Chained".
I even had to double check that I didn't mention it in the description or weaknesses.
Anyway, will make a note of that.
---
Defensive spells go up to 3x, even 4x in some cases, their rank in value. Being a pure defense spell, it would be a 3x defense spell. Being a chained spell, I docked 1 rank from the value as though it were not a pure defense spell.
It IS regardless a full A-rank spell that costs as such with every cast. I do not believe you're fully comprehending the implications of what you are suggesting.
Any spell as you described would be worth less than the mana spent. The weakness of Chained spells are that they are essentially one use per topic and cost MASSIVE amounts of MP to make full use of.
I assume perhaps you thought that was a Signature spell, thus having no MP cost. If that were the case I could
certainly agree with you, though even then the stacking cooldowns (which signatures should not have cooldowns, by design) would still make it a one use per topic spell so that's still a massive point to consider.
That's a bonus A-rank spell slot gained from sacrificing an Artifact armor, meaning it is extremely expensive to cast and will drain you of MP with just a few uses / chain links.
I apologize for the confusion. I've always wondered if it might trip someone up for me to include the normal spell slot bonuses from signature spell item trades in with the signature spells they came with, I don't think I did enough to distinguish them from the signatures.
As such I've Indented the bonus spells for convenience.
•
Lot's Plague;
That whole first part just killed off the entire non-magic NPC part of the entire site. That's unnecessary. Use something like that in agreed upon plots, it's not needed in the magic.
As for the actual effects: Multi-Target spells deal 75% less damage 'per hit' than normal. You want to deal a total of 200% more damage overall to an unlimited amount of people as well as remove immunities and damage resist and reduce evasion (something that is more an RP thing than a percent chance thing). This is not how multi-hits work, and would never be approvable with this if you wished for it to be one. What you have here is a DoT. So you'll need to rewrite for that before I move on for it. If you wish to make it AoE or DoT or both let me know and I'll grade it as that.
http://prntscr.com/gy83x9 reference on multi-target spells.
- Spoiler:
Doesn't really matter, everyone ignores any changes to the world or even preset information about a world. Every player lives in their own little universe with brief moments where two universe momentarily rub off on another when they touch via topics with one another. Even an S-rank mage might destroy forum locations, or even a D-rank mage fooling around with some of their own plot NPCs.
So yeah that's exactly what it is; Plots. And I don't do things in plots that I do not have the means of doing via magic apps. I avoid making things up randomly, and thus I create tools in my magic apps with which to create plots.
It doesn't matter how many people are anywhere if they are exposed to the same effect. An AOE fire ball isn't going to do less damage to Jim just because it also damaged Jane, and they're all NPCs.
This is an NPC spell. It's non-combat. People have made worse as completely free """"""Non-Combat / Plot"""""" abilities.
The only relevant part is the last paragraph.
"Those baring magic tend to resist the plague, but instead go through a very brief but violent reaction. For 10 posts they'll take D-rank damage per post and lose any immunities and resistances to damage they possess. A headache and vertigo make it awkward to stand or run, reducing evasion by 30%, while grains of sand rapidly growing beneath their skin cause pain in the joints and when gripping things. (Said sand once the spell ends disintegrates and is absorbed by their internal magics to dissipate entirely)"
In other words, everything up until then is a """" Plot """" ability, while the spell is actually a 10 post DOT dealing D-rank damage and a anti-resistance debuff.
The only obvious problem is that there's no apparent limit on Range, which I'll be adding into the last paragraph in addition to that once used the 10 post duration applies from casting and not from exposure, meaning even if it was used in a topic and it was spreading among the NPC's, PC's wouldn't be effected if it was used before combat as 10 posts can be considered to have already past since casting, and that if used in combat even it it spreads it wont hurt the PC's after the 10 posts past.
I'm aware that evasion is more of an RP thing, but people keep adding %'s to weird RP things anyway that don't make much sense so might as well. For example, how on earth do you measure a % based increase to senses as seen in the Slayer perks? And even more important, 10% wouldn't even do anything. That's so little it doesn't even compare to natural differences between two normal individuals, lmao. A % boost to senses would have to be measured by several hundred % increases to be special. For example, a dog's sense of smell is 100,000 times that of a human.
Immunities aren't even supposed to be a thing anymore, allegedly.
All it really is in the end is a plot tool that does D-rank damage a post and clear resistances. Does that really sound like too much for an S-rank spell? I've seen S-rank spells do worlds worse than that, even S-rank spells that have been stronger than the last H-rank spell I've made. Hell, even stronger than this H-rank spell I've made too.
Also can I just use this moment to point out that the DOT rules are broken as well? You have a hard-limit on the damage potential of a DoT, but all that does is encourage people to divide the allowed damage between as few posts as possible when a DOT should reward you for dragging the duration out as long as you can, not as short as you can. Minimal immediate damage is supposed to be rewarded with maximum damage total by the end.
I tried to convey that point when these dot rules were being made and I managed to get them improved a fair bit, you should have seen the previous dot rules that were almost added instead, they were even less useful than the current Charged spell rules.
Anyway. Dots should really be encouraged to do more damage over long durations.
Replaced the spell with Tomb of the Lost.
•
Dune God's Bombardment;
This falls under the multi-target spell, it would have to be lowered to 300 meters unless you want to add another proper weakness. Since it's an AoE, and if I read it correctly they cannot hit the same spot at all (Each 25 meters of the AoE does not overlap at all) then it's simply 50 damage to each spot with an extremely low chance for someone to be hit again. If that's the case then the range change is the only thing I ask.
It's an AoE. It's just not a single giant explosion, it's eight small explosions for what is effectively a 200 meter area explosion. 200/8 = 25.
Nope, they can't hit the same spot. Further supporting the idea of being an AoE.
It's an AOE with more flavor and following a specific theme.
But like how some spells might have some quirks or situations where they might do additional damage, this one just has the possibility that if someone is moving fast across a large area they might get hit by a second one or something. It isn't an intended use of the spell, just a possible side effect and thus I describe what would happen in that case, just like I always do when I think of possible outcomes of something, I provide detail and describe weaknesses and what might happen in that case usually to preemptively nerf a possible usage and prevent abuse or questionable content ahead of time myself. I do always try to balance my things, and as you might have noticed I talk too much.
If you'd like I could give it a Nerf-Buff that makes it so if you're hit you're Petrified till the end of the post which would make it so you couldn't get hit by multiple parts of the AoE if you wanted to.
WAIT, I'm confused. I gave it a duration of 5 posts and it says... .I think I made it an AOE DOT spell but each DOT was in a new spot. I think I got confused myself halfway when I wrote the spell and by the end it became a normal AOE but the first half was an AoE DoT, where each post had a separate strike.
So on one post it's a 25 meter AoE sun strike, then on the next post it's a new 25 meter AoE Sun Strike and so on.
Good heavens it's a mess.
Let me just go ahead and rewrite it.
Papa Aiya wrote:•
Radiant Echoes;
This is doing a bit much for a signature spell. Sig spells are meant to be simplistic as well as doing a single simple thing. A blast of your element for damage, a quick strike with an elemental punch, etc. What you have here is the ability to clone an entire spell that causes it to do the same thing but for S rank damage. That would be considered multiple effects. Adding 50% S rank damage to a spell would be okay, cloning an entire spell means copying multiple different things plus doing damage is overkill for a Sig.
- Spoiler:
How is it too much? How could it be any more basic?
It's literally nothing but pure damage, it is the epitome of basic. It's so basic that it is incapable of taking any shape on its own. The ONLY way to use it is to cast another spell for it to piggy back on.
I'm fully aware of the simplicity of Signature spells as I made the concept myself with things like magic bullets and classic fireballs or lightning zaps in mind, but it was never intended to be that limiting, surely no cause for spells to be boring.
This spell is nothing but damage, it has no Range, it has no Speed, it has no Area, and it has no use at all without you actively casting another spell. I physically cannot cast it on its own.
It's mechanically little to no different than having shot them with a basic lightning bolt after having thrown a fireball. I just throw an Echo of the fireball instead of the lightning bolt and pair them. But with this being an Echo it has to follow behind the spell that it's being carried by, and with the delay between the first spell and the echo it's not very likely that they'll be hit.
I am replacing this spell entirely due to disagreements and it's simply not a spell worth further discussion on, most spells would be more useful.
_______________________________________
Hey, could you quote my spells when you look over them and as you review, just make the changes you want as you would like to see the spell, just highlight changes in red or something. Shouldn't be any more, or not much more, work than normal I think. And it might make less hassle for us both in the long run.
I'd probably just directly use what you provided that way and we can go much faster! If i make the changes myself I get a little defensive, and sometimes pride and a sense of inconvenience can make it hard to follow through.
But if I could just use the changes you provide I'll probably just go with that most the time.
Part of why this has taken so long to post is how intensely demotivated the whole over-100-day review process has made me.
Watching Thor-Ragnarok has rekindled my creative spirit though and I kinda just want to get it over with.
![Senior [500]](https://i.imgur.com/Nmfn8cD.png)
10% Buff to physical stats(strength, speed etc)
