Stuffing Stockings and Mean-Spirited Maps

"I hate this town," the girl in green grumbled as she pulled her hood of her cloak forward in a vain attempt to block out some of the incessant noise. "What are they on about anyway? It's not even a festival day, and they're still carousing over half the city." She sighed, consulted a scrap of paper with a few shakily scrawled lines on it, and turned down an alley. "Remind me why we came to this noisebox again?"

"As I recall Ashelia, this was your idea to begin with. The moment the man mentioned this 'Chalice of Incarna' you took the job and rushed home to pack your bags, shouting something about 'the find of a lifetime'." For someone supposedly too dignified to use them the old king was surprisingly adept at working air quotes into his speech. "Need I also remind you that there is a very good chance this is a fake? Your employer is doubtful enough of it's authenticity that he isn't even sending one of his own servants to verify it. What does that tell you?"

"Stuff a stocking in it Vendrick. If it is real it really will be the find of a lifetime!" Ashe countered, with a gleam in her eye. "No-one has found another one of Incarna's artifacts in the last hundred years. If it's the real deal, history will be one step closer to solving the Riddle of Iskander!" Her excitement was cut short however, for just as she was about to exit the alleyway Ashe had to jump back to avoid getting swept up in a sudden mob of people rushing past. She watched slack-jawed as the mob swept up some poor girl standing in the middle of the street and shanghaied her into a dance routine.

"Do you see that? See what I mean?" Ashe exclaimed, whirling to face Vendrick with one arm  pointing accusingly at the retreating crowd. "These people are insane!"

"Excuse me, dear? Is everything alright?" The voice came from a concerned looking housewife leaning out of a second-story window just above.

"Oh! Um, yes, everything's fine! My apologies!" She replied nervously, bowing at the waist before continuing on out of the alley in a hurry. Vendrick, for his part, simply pinched the bridge of his ghostly nose between his thumb and forefinger, shaking his head in amusement.

"Ashelia, you must pay more attention to your surroundings. Did you forget again that I am invisible to most mortals?"

"Stockings. Stuff them." After coming to a stop in front of a certain shop, a quick glance at the scribbled upon paper brought a furrow to the girl's brow. "Vendrick, we're in the right place aren't we?"

He leaned over her shoulder. "Inasmuch as this poor excuse for a map is concerned, yes. This appears to be the correct building."

"Then why does the sign read 'Madame Laurel's Fine Taxidermy, send your treasured friends to get stuffed...'" Ashe could feel her face burning bright red as the realization hit her. "Oh."

"It appears your friend at the tavern was perhaps a bit upset that you didn't respond appropriately to his subtle hints that you provide a, ah, 'suitable service' for his 'big tip'."

Flush with embarrassment, Ashe pulled her hood even further forward and sat dejectedly on a nearby bench, pulling her knees up against her chest. "I hate this town."

The ghost king patted her comfortingly on the shoulder. "Worry not. The people in this region are very friendly on the whole. It shan't be too hard to find proper directions."

"I should hope so. Almost anything would be better than this." Crumpling up the offending scrap of paper, Ashe flung it angrily into the street to be trampled by a horse. Knowing her luck however, it was no surprise when the wind took hold and saved it at the last second, causing it to fly and hit some passerby in the face.

Ashe sighed. "Fantastic."

"Why are they so persistent?!"

Felicity will say it many times over again as she was running from the Rune Knights over a simple misunderstanding about her condition. The Crimson God Slayer was looking to get some magical items to help her investigation into finding the others before they found her. They would have followed her into Bellum and would try to recover their vessel for conquest. Now that she arrived at town, Rune Knights were attempting to stop her and question her why she was blood splattered all the time. Of course they did not believe the truth, so they assumed that she murdered someone. So now the Crimson God Slayer was running down the streets and past the crowd of people at the marketplace. There was several benefits of being a Slayer and the one that was saving her right now was the physical enhancements that it gave. Darting between people she eventually was faced by a wall of people that seemed to stampede towards her, carrying a girl as they have kidnapped her and made the poor girl dance. Felicity was going to initially run past them, but not before making a  running start jump kick at what she assumed was the leader of this little kidnapping group.

Conquest sighed as Felicity ran past the now shocked crowd and shook its head as she floated next to her. She was amused at the antics, but wished for a more permanent way to deal with the countries police. Maybe a show of force to dissuade the? Conquest simply said, "You know they are going to keep chasing you until you do something right?" Felicity had not time to argue, she was formulating a plan to escape the clutches of the Rune Knights. She then made an incision into her hand and dropped it next to a white haired girl that was talking to some guy. Felicity ran around the corner of the block with the Rune Knights at tow. The Slayer smiled widely as the plan was in the works, but eventually she was trapped in an alleyway. The girl had her hands in the air in feigned surrender until she said, "Well it was nice meeting you all. However I feel that you all are invading my space, so goodbye fare thee well!" The Slayer then melted into a pool of blood before they managed to cuff her. Soon the pool of blood evaporated and there was not a trace for the confused Rune Knights to arrest.

However Felicity simply teleported from the alley around the corner to the spot that she bled at earlier. She panted a bit out of breath, but otherwise she was in the clear for now. Well that was until the next person reported Felicity looking like a serial killer or a victim. It was hard for her, but she would endure for another day. Looking at the Soul of Conquest Felicity simply asked, "What were we dong here again? Id rather be back at the guild and not get unjustly classed as some kind of sicko." Conquest chuckled darkly as she looked down the street and answered bemusedly, "Well you wanted to find an artifact that may exist and while Chalice of Incarna could be a myth... Myths are based on some kind of truth. Knowledge is power and leads to Conquest." Felicity sighed, what was she to argue with the Horsewoman that saved her life? So walking down the road she walked towards the previous white haired girl and the man, but somehow kicked the crumpled paper that now was heading straight for the ladies face.

While Ashe wasn't particularly worried by the group of Rune Knights chasing a woman through the streets (this was Magnolia after all), she did raise an eyebrow at the spirit accompanying her. Spirit companions were something of a rarity even among mages and tended to stick out like a sore thumb to Ashe's sight, but this one in particular was something special.

"Now that is a rare sight." The ghost king muttered, stroking his chin.

"You know her Vendrick?" Ashe shaded her eyes and peered after the retreating figures. It was difficult to get a good look through the crowd, and it wasn't long before they turned a corner and out of sight. "Who was that? An old friend? That's the first soul I've seen that compares to yours."

"You have much yet to see Ashelia, remember that. As for her...well, I cannot say for certain, but I may have seen one of her kind long, long ago. That one had a different aura about them, but they do bear similarities. If so...hmmm." Vendrick studied a splatter of blood that appeared to have fallen from the woman whom the spirit had been following and watched as the blood began to stir of it's own accord. "I suspect we need not wonder much longer."

Sure enough, the woman and the spirit materialized from the blood seconds later panting and out of breath. Upon closer inspection the human of the two seemed to be covered in blood, but oddly showed no obvious signs of injury that would account for that amount of blood.

Perhaps it's magic? I've heard of blood mages before...and she does have a rather interesting spirit with her. Maybe I should...

Ashe's thoughts were interrupted by a gentle push from Vendrick. "Go on, introduce yourself."

She immediately recoiled in horror. "B-but Vendrick! She's-"

"You must needs begin socializing with the living sooner or later, and this is a better opportunity than most. Go on."

"But-"

"Go." The look on the ghost king's face made it clear there would be no further argument.

"Fine, fine. Don't get your unders in a bunch." With a deep breath to steady her nerves Ashe rose from the bench, flipping back her hood and taking a moment to nervously pat off some of the dust from the road before stepping forward to intercept the pair as they walked past.

"Um, e-excuse me? M-my name is Ashelia, and I was w-wondering if you, I m-mean do you...well, that is to say..." Ashe could feel little beads of sweat forming as she tried to force the words to come out properly. Come on Ashe, you can do this! It's just the same as you're used to, the only difference is she has fleshy bits! She gulped and averted her gaze before she was caught staring at anything inappropriate. Ok, maybe don't focus on the fleshy bits, but still! It's not that hard, just take a deeeeeep breath and pretend she's a ghost or something. No problem right?Following her own advice she inhaled and slowly exhaled another breath, but blushed furiously as she realized she was literally standing there doing breathing exercises in front of the person she was supposed to be talking to. It took an act of will not to pull her hood up to hide her face out of embarrassment.

"S-sorry! It's just, well, you two seemed like you were having trouble, and I was hop- I mean, w-wondering if you perhaps required any, um, assistance? N-not that you need any of course! But I seem to be a bit lost, and I was wonder- I mean, uh, h-hoping that maybe we could help each other out..." She trailed off, fidgeted, and fell silent, not sure of what else to say. A furtive peek towards Vendrick showed the ghost king watching impassively and offering her no help at all. Hopefully one of the two would take pity on her and say something, because Ashe was fairly certain that if they didn't she would probably die.

Rather than put her at ease, the girl Felicity's response only served to confuse and further embarrass Ashe. She thinks I'm pretty, but doesn't think I should sell myself? H-how do I respond to this? She's rather pretty too, should I return the compliment? Did she understand what I said in the first place?

"T-thank you, you're v-very p-p-pretty y-yours-self," Ashe somehow managed to reply, fidgeting with her fingers while her face turned beet red. "But s-selling myself? I'm s-sorry, but I d-don't quite f-follow..." Of course, it was at that moment that it dawned on her what Felicity had meant by 'selling yourself'. Ashe violently waved her hands in negation, mortified. "Oh! No no, y-you're mistaken! I was s-simply asking for d-directions! I would n-never do something so vulgar as t-that!"

Vendrick finally relented, stepping forward to rest a hand reassuringly on his agitated protege. Ashe calmed down a bit at the contact, and the old king turned to answer Conquest. Rather than be intimidated by the horsewoman's demeanor he simply remained as calm and impassive as ever. It would take far more than that to break the composure instilled in him over the ages.

"I am Vendrick, once called King, now known as Spirit Ruler by those few who yet remember me. The pleasure is mine." He motioned towards Ashe with his free hand. "This is Ashelia, my mortal vessel. And yes, her shyness can lead to some...interesting situations."

"Stuff it Vendrick. Don't embarrass me in front of the spirit people too." She muttered, shyness temporarily forgotten. She offered a short and polite bow to Conquest before continuing. "Pleasure to meet you. You said your name was Conquest? Would that by any chance be in reference to the Conquest, Horseman of the Apocalypse? Though I suppose it would be Horsewoman in your case wouldn't it? I had heard legends, but to imagine they were true! You must remember so many interesting bits of history! Oh, for instance, do you remember the Battle of-"

A sharp squeeze on the shoulder from Vendrick cut her short and reigned in her enthusiasm. "Ahem. Pardon me, I tend to get carried away sometimes. What brings you to this town? As I was saying earlier to your, um, th-that is, as I was saying t-t-to Fe-Felicity," Ashe paused to catch her breath. Mentioning the other girl had reminded her that she was right there the entire time, which of course brought her social phobia straight back to the surface along with the accompanying red flush of embarrassment. "You two s-s-seem to be having some, um, s-some difficulties, and seeing as how we, um, seem to be l-l-lost..." She trailed off in frustration.

This is getting us nowhere. Come on Ashe, you can do it! Close your eyes, deep breaths, aaaand-

"Imsorrybutweseemtobelostandyoulooklikeyouareintroublesomaybewecouldhelpeachotherout?"

After that outburst Ashe was left panting, eyes squeezed shut and fists clenched at her sides. Vendrick couldn't help but laugh at that as he patted her comfortingly on the back. Hopefully the other two were able to understand the slew of words, as she certainly couldn't manage one of those a second time.

That...that...bitch!

Ashe was about to try her best to reassure the other girl that there was no harm done when Conquest rounded on her, apparently taking offense that she dared speak without permission. Though initially surprised, anger quickly clouded her features as the spirit actually threatened her for asking questions. Felicity was quick to offer an explanation as the Horsewoman walked away before going on to explain that they didn't have any better idea of where to go than Ashe did and that they were just here to look for a 'Chalice'. That piqued her interest, but then the other girl put a hand on her shoulder, nearly sending her into another stuttering fit from the contact alone, and asked if she liked root beer floats of all things. Ashe wanted to accept the invitation and see if the Chalice they were looking for was the same as the one she was seeking, but there was something she had to settle first.

"Um, hold that thought." Ashe said, awkwardly patting the hand on her shoulder before stomping off after Conquest.

"I'll have you know that was completely uncalled for!" Ashe started in as soon as she was face to face with the Horsewoman. "It is incredibly rude to treat someone that way right after they politely introduced themselves! Not to mention making all those assumptions. As if I would ask a question I already knew the answer to! The nerve!" She stamped her foot, almost petulantly, to drive her point home. "Shy I may be, but I'll not take that degree of unwarranted abuse from anyone. Not the living, and certainly not the dead. Or whatever manner of spirit you are. Threaten me if you want, I'll not have it."

Somewhat calmed after that rant, Ashe stepped back a bit and crossed her arms. "If I show you respect, it is only proper that you do the same! 'Like begets like, and without respect a king is merely a tyrant waiting for the knife'. King Ricard the Fourth said that, and he ruled for sixty-four years without one iota of rebellion during his entire reign. And that's not to mention that when he died the lords of ten warring kingdoms all put aside their differences and made peace to honor his passing, so I think I can safely say that proper respect is really important. We're not talking apes after all."

Meanwhile, Vendrick couldn't decide if he wanted to laugh or sigh. He was proud of the girl for sticking up for herself against the spirit of the apocalypse of course, he had taught her no less, but her tendency to turn any argument or discussion into a history lesson was...trying, to say the least. In the end he decided to do a little of both. It was a choice he found himself making more and more often these days.

Conquest turned around and smiled widely, good this girl had some bite after all. Now lets see how strong her convictions were. Turning around the spirit continued to walk back with the most evil of smiles as she said, "Says the talking ape or would you rather be called a dog? It matters not, because you spout out history as if you truly understand it. However you forget to realize one thing..." Felicity sighed as she knew this was going to take a while. She quietly walked away to a store and ordered a pair of Root Beer Floats so that she could at least try to be friends. She only was out of ear reach when the Spirit of Conquest whispered something in Ashe's ear that would echo and pierce her very soul, "There is a funny thing about poisons. They can be made to be untraceable or appear to be an illness, but what do I know about history?"