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    Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame

    GraveDragon
    GraveDragon

    The Elemental Armory


    The Elemental Armory

    Magic Application Approved!- Character Application Approved!- Complete Your First Job!- Obtain A Lineage!- Join A Faction!- Novice [250]- 1 Year Anniversary- Player 
    Lineage : Armored Beast
    Position : None
    Posts : 452
    Guild : Fairy Tail
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 33
    Experience : 800

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Omni-Elemental Manipulation
    Second Skill:
    Third Skill:

    Completed Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame

    Post by GraveDragon 28th December 2014, 5:52 pm

    Name: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  
    Rank: Legendary +
    Type: Mithril Great Sword
    Description: A very long, thick, jagged blade made of Mithril and forged in the heat of living fire is held by a grip wrapped in extravagant, dark brown shark skin.The sharp, dual-edged blade makes this weapon the choice for any warrior looking for a versatile weapon ideal for any combat style.The blade has a jagged, Curved cross-guard, offering plenty of protection to the owner's hands and thus his life. The blade itself is unadorned. No markings can be found, the blade needs no decorations, it only needs to be strong and sharp. The weapon appears to weigh 25 lbs from it's sheer height and width, Weighing at 5 lbs with a 5' blade length, 15" wide and 10" hilt length making the sword 5'10" from pommel to tip of blade. (Mithril in its pure form was apparently rather soft and malleable. It could be used for various alloys to produce extremely lightweight, hard and durable items.)
    Description :
    Strengths:
    -Durable: Being made from combination of alloy's of Mithril, makes it more durable then steel. This weapon can take one extra of users rank in damage before destroyed.
    -Lightweight: Being made from a light weight metal makes it the standard weight of a great sword. (The size makes it look larger.)
    -Fireproof: This weapon takes 25% less damage from fire attacks.
    -Mana Increase: While weapon is on the user in anyway he gains 5% more mana.
    Weaknesses:
    -Slayer Weakness: The blade it's self can be consumed by Metal type slayers. (The blade has no properties of fire until white fire embodiment is used.)
    -Unwieldy: Due to it's size certain maneuvers are harder to perform.
    -Metal: Can be manipulated by weapon's rank or higher metal type magic users, max of A-Rank or higher. (i.e. if weapons rank is C-Rank, can be manipulated by C-Rank and higher metal magic user.)
    -Destruction: Can be destroyed if hit by three weapon rank in damage max of three A-Rank. (i.e. 3 D-Rank attacks if users at D-Rank)
    Abilities:

    White Flame Embodiment:

    Shiro hi Bakufū:


    Last edited by GraveDragon on 19th January 2015, 1:28 am; edited 2 times in total


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Fear me, for I have chopped down a tree with a herring!

    Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  15n28na

    Themes :



    Current Rank:B
    EXP: 800
    Next Rank: 7500
    COMPLETED JOBS:
    D Rank=4, C Rank=1, B Rank=1, A Rank=0, S Rank=0
    Cirven
    Cirven

    Devil's Advocate


    Devil's Advocate

    Moderator- VIP- Quality Badge Level 1- Quality Badge Level 2- Quality Badge Level 3- Guild Master- Demon Slayer- Senior [500]- Novice [250]- Player 
    Lineage : The Devil Jester
    Position : None
    Posts : 2448
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 35
    Experience : 833,050

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Devil's Zeal
    Second Skill: Aphyon Jivven
    Third Skill: Vir'ednith

    Completed Re: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame

    Post by Cirven 6th January 2015, 9:16 pm

    Hey Grave, I'll be working with this review. Bump after and if you have any questions or concerns PM me.

    GraveDragon wrote:Name: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  
    Rank: Legendary +
    Type: Mithril Great Sword
    Description: A very long, thick, jagged blade made of Mithril and forged with living fire is held by a grip wrapped in extravagant, dark brown shark skin.The sharp, dual-edged blade makes this weapon the choice for any warrior looking for a versatile weapon ideal for any combat style.The blade has a jagged, Curved cross-guard, offering plenty of protection to the owner's hands and thus his life. The blade itself is unadorned. No markings can be found, the blade needs no decorations, it only needs to be strong and sharp. Weighing at 25 lbs with a 5' blade length, 15" wide and 10" hilt length making the sword 5'10" from pommel to tip of blade.
    Description :
    Strengths:
    -Legendary: As a Legendary weapon, Dyrnwyn is capable of dealing a maximum of A-rank damage per strike if wielded by a capable warrior. Weapon damage goes by rank of the user not by rank of weapon. So this strength isn't really correct and it is actually something that is known. Please change this for something not as obvious.
    -Lightweight: Being made from a light weight metal it's half the weight of a standard great sword 25lbs is not a lightweight weapon at all so this strength wouldn't work. You could change in your description that it appears to be 25 lbs and then this will work better.
    -Fireproof: This weapon takes no damage from A-Rank or less fire damage. This blade can take less damage from fire sources but not just straight not take damage. 25% less damage from all fire sources should work here.
    -Mana Increase: While weapon is on the user in anyway he gains 5% more mana.
    Weaknesses:
    -Slayer Weakness: Can be consumed by Metal type slayers. Isn't this sword made of flames also? If so Fire Slayers can eat the flames.
    -Unwieldy: Due to it's size certain maneuvers are harder to perform.
    -Metal: Can be manipulated by A-Rank or higher metal type magic users. This weapon will scale with your rank like how your spells will meaning D-rank and higher can manipulate this at your rank now and then it will scale up with your rank until A.
    -Destruction: Can be destroyed if hit by S-Rank or higher damage. This threshold ranks with you and will start at 2 D-rank damage and end at 2 A-rank damage.
    Abilities:

    White Flame Embodiment:

    Shiro hi Bakufū:


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  LxcTBIi
    Character Info:
    GraveDragon
    GraveDragon

    The Elemental Armory


    The Elemental Armory

    Magic Application Approved!- Character Application Approved!- Complete Your First Job!- Obtain A Lineage!- Join A Faction!- Novice [250]- 1 Year Anniversary- Player 
    Lineage : Armored Beast
    Position : None
    Posts : 452
    Guild : Fairy Tail
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 33
    Experience : 800

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Omni-Elemental Manipulation
    Second Skill:
    Third Skill:

    Completed Re: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame

    Post by GraveDragon 8th January 2015, 7:30 pm

    Edited bump, made some changes hope it works out


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Fear me, for I have chopped down a tree with a herring!

    Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  15n28na

    Themes :



    Current Rank:B
    EXP: 800
    Next Rank: 7500
    COMPLETED JOBS:
    D Rank=4, C Rank=1, B Rank=1, A Rank=0, S Rank=0
    Cirven
    Cirven

    Devil's Advocate


    Devil's Advocate

    Moderator- VIP- Quality Badge Level 1- Quality Badge Level 2- Quality Badge Level 3- Guild Master- Demon Slayer- Senior [500]- Novice [250]- Player 
    Lineage : The Devil Jester
    Position : None
    Posts : 2448
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 35
    Experience : 833,050

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Devil's Zeal
    Second Skill: Aphyon Jivven
    Third Skill: Vir'ednith

    Completed Re: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame

    Post by Cirven 8th January 2015, 7:57 pm

    GraveDragon wrote:Name: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  
    Rank: Legendary +
    Type: Mithril Great Sword
    Description: A very long, thick, jagged blade made of Mithril and forged in the heat of living fire is held by a grip wrapped in extravagant, dark brown shark skin.The sharp, dual-edged blade makes this weapon the choice for any warrior looking for a versatile weapon ideal for any combat style.The blade has a jagged, Curved cross-guard, offering plenty of protection to the owner's hands and thus his life. The blade itself is unadorned. No markings can be found, the blade needs no decorations, it only needs to be strong and sharp. The weapon appears to weigh 25 lbs from it's sheer height and width, Weighing at 5 lbs with a 5' blade length, 15" wide and 10" hilt length making the sword 5'10" from pommel to tip of blade. (Mithril in its pure form was apparently rather soft and malleable. It could be used for various alloys to produce extremely lightweight, hard and durable items.)
    Description :
    Strengths:
    -Durable: Being made from combination of alloy's of Mithril, makes it more durable then steel. The weapon takes more damage before its destroyed. This sounds more like a weakness than a strength with the way you are wording it here.
    -Lightweight: Being made from a light weight metal makes it the standard weight of a great sword. (The size makes it look larger.)
    -Fireproof: This weapon takes 25% less damage from fire attacks.
    -Mana Increase: While weapon is on the user in anyway he gains 5% more mana.
    Weaknesses:
    -Slayer Weakness: The blade it's self can be consumed by Metal type slayers. (The blade has no properties of fire until white fire embodiment is used.)
    -Unwieldy: Due to it's size certain maneuvers are harder to perform.
    -Metal: Can be manipulated by users rank or higher metal type magic users, max of A-Rank or higher. Please add rank of the weapon or higher.
    -Destruction: Can be destroyed if hit by three user's rank in damage max of three A-Rank. (i.e. 3 D-Rank attacks if users at D-Rank) Please change this to weapon rank.
    Abilities:

    White Flame Embodiment:

    Shiro hi Bakufū:


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  LxcTBIi
    Character Info:
    GraveDragon
    GraveDragon

    The Elemental Armory


    The Elemental Armory

    Magic Application Approved!- Character Application Approved!- Complete Your First Job!- Obtain A Lineage!- Join A Faction!- Novice [250]- 1 Year Anniversary- Player 
    Lineage : Armored Beast
    Position : None
    Posts : 452
    Guild : Fairy Tail
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 33
    Experience : 800

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Omni-Elemental Manipulation
    Second Skill:
    Third Skill:

    Completed Re: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame

    Post by GraveDragon 19th January 2015, 1:29 am

    bump took the invisibility out hope this works


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Fear me, for I have chopped down a tree with a herring!

    Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame  15n28na

    Themes :



    Current Rank:B
    EXP: 800
    Next Rank: 7500
    COMPLETED JOBS:
    D Rank=4, C Rank=1, B Rank=1, A Rank=0, S Rank=0
    Akryn
    Akryn

    Quality Badge Level 1- X-Mas Event Participant- 1 Year Anniversary- Player 
    Lineage : Lucifer's Aura
    Position : None
    Posts : 821
    Guild : Guildless
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 33
    Mentor : Thorsfell, Gamara, Vishnu, Cytorakk, Botosai
    Experience : 1625

    Character Sheet
    First Skill: Wind Magic
    Second Skill: None
    Third Skill:

    Completed Re: Dyrnwyn, The Destructive Flame

    Post by Akryn 7th February 2015, 8:11 pm

    Everything seems in order. Approved.


    _____________________________________________________________________________________

    Prayne de crabug ahm keike rinedere be-yogt iglo kes gron!


    Akryns battle theme

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    "I came into this world, kicking, screaming, and covered in someone elses blood. I have little issue going out the same way."

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